28 February 2009, 17:53 | #1 |
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The coding humor thread.
Post your coding humor pics here
Last edited by Thorham; 14 August 2014 at 18:32. Reason: Broken link. |
28 February 2009, 20:44 | #2 |
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01 March 2009, 01:01 | #3 |
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Ha ha, I laughed out loud at that one.
Don't know if this is quite right for this thread but I like this piece of code which is a basic flight simulator: Code:
#include <math.h> #include <sys/time.h> #include <X11/Xlib.h> #include <X11/keysym.h> double L ,o ,P ,_=dt,T,Z,D=1,d, s[999],E,h= 8,I, J,K,w[999],M,m,O ,n[999],j=33e-3,i= 1E3,r,t, u,v ,W,S= 74.5,l=221,X=7.26, a,B,A=32.2,c, F,H; int N,q, C, y,p,U; Window z; char f[52] ; GC k; main(){ Display*e= XOpenDisplay( 0); z=RootWindow(e,0); for (XSetForeground(e,k=XCreateGC (e,z,0,0),BlackPixel(e,0)) ; scanf("%lf%lf%lf",y +n,w+y, y+s)+1; y ++); XSelectInput(e,z= XCreateSimpleWindow(e,z,0,0,400,400, 0,0,WhitePixel(e,0) ),KeyPressMask); for(XMapWindow(e,z); ; T=sin(O)){ struct timeval G={ 0,dt*1e6} ; K= cos(j); N=1e4; M+= H*_; Z=D*K; F+=_*P; r=E*K; W=cos( O); m=K*W; H=K*T; O+=D*_*F/ K+d/K*E*_; B= sin(j); a=B*T*D-E*W; XClearWindow(e,z); t=T*E+ D*B*W; j+=d*_*D-_*F*E; P=W*E*B-T*D; for (o+=(I=D*W+E *T*B,E*d/K *B+v+B/K*F*D)*_; p<y; ){ T=p[s]+i; E=c-p[w]; D=n[p]-L; K=D*m-B*T-H*E; if(p [n]+w[ p]+p[s ]== 0|K <fabs(W=T*r-I*E +D*P) |fabs(D=t *D+Z *T-a *E)> K)N=1e4; else{ q=W/K *4E2+2e2; C= 2E2+4e2/ K *D; N-1E4&& XDrawLine(e ,z,k,N ,U,q,C); N=q; U=C; } ++p; } L+=_* (X*t +P*M+m*l); T=X*X+ l*l+M *M; XDrawString(e,z,k ,20,380,f,17); D=v/l*15; i+=(B *l-M*r -X*Z)*_; for(; XPending(e); u *=CS!=N){ XEvent z; XNextEvent(e ,&z); ++*((N=XLookupKeysym (&z.xkey,0))-IT? N-LT? UP-N?& E:& J:& u: &h); --*( DN -N? N-DT ?N== RT?&u: & W:&h:&J ); } m=15*F/l; c+=(I=M/ l,l*H +I*M+a*X)*_; H =A*r+v*X-F*l+( E=.1+X*4.9/l,t =T*m/32-I*T/24 )/S; K=F*M+( h* 1e4/l-(T+ E*5*T*E)/3e2 )/S-X*d-B*A; a=2.63 /l*d; X+=( d*l-T/S *(.19*E +a *.64+J/1e3 )-M* v +A* Z)*_; l += K *_; W=d; sprintf(f, "%5d %3d" "%7d",p =l /1.7,(C=9E3+ O*57.3)%0550,(int)i); d+=T*(.45-14/l* X-a*130-J* .14)*_/125e2+F*_*v; P=(T*(47 *I-m* 52+E*94 *D-t*.38+u*.21*E) /1e2+W* 179*v)/2312; select(p=0,0,0,0,&G); v-=( W*F-T*(.63*m-I*.086+m*E*19-D*25-.11*u )/107e2)*_; D=cos(o); E=sin(o); } } |
01 March 2009, 04:44 | #4 |
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0001 LDA $41
0003 JSR $FFD2 0006 JMP $0001 I swear this thing only goes around in circles. Paul |
10 March 2009, 23:15 | #5 |
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I measure code quality in knots. Your code should have a low number of knots for it to go fast.
For measuring tape, tie together a bunch of spaghettis. Naturally, the more pasta programming you've accomplished, the more knots needed to tie a long enough measuring tape, eh, spaghetti! |
10 March 2009, 23:19 | #6 |
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11 March 2009, 01:11 | #7 |
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11 March 2009, 17:37 | #8 |
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I really hate this damn machine,
I wish that I could sell it. It never does quite what I want, But only what I tell it. |
11 March 2009, 17:45 | #9 |
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Code:
A C Man's Lament ---------------- The problem I find when I'm looking at lines Of programs all written in C Is that the syntax and grammar resemble the stammer Of a dyslexic demoralized bee. I'll bet any man here (I'll wager a beer) Can't guess how to copy a string. The mess is dramatic, all [ . & _ ! Pointers collected, and thrice indirected, Collated in structs and compiled, When traced by debugger can make coders shudder, And conditionals drive a man wild. I don't wish to seem bitchy, but if only old Ritchie Had been strangled a birth by a Nurse; And the fate that I've planned for all Kernighan's clan Is unprintably several times worse. I find that the pain begins with the main(), The only way out is to hack it. The one bit of syntax that keeps my mind intact Is the very last } I hope that this ode is clearer that code I write in that monstrosity. You might think that Pascal's a bit of a rascal, But the ultimate b*d is C. My program is calling (in structure appalling), I must finish my poetic plea. But, let's all face it, use Forth, LISP or BASIC, Whatever you do, don't use C. Translator's guide to pronunciation: [ = open square bracket . = dot & = ampersand _ = underscore ! = pling } = close curly bracket * = star |
12 March 2009, 16:27 | #10 |
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Hehehe What a lovely ode girv! You wrote this? Ace!
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12 March 2009, 16:29 | #11 |
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No! I didn't write it at all - I first read it in an old computer magazine back in the 1980s!
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12 March 2009, 17:06 | #12 |
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Is Dave Small the author of this text ?
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12 March 2009, 17:09 | #13 |
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I think it was Rupert Goodwin:
http://community.zdnet.co.uk/blog/0,...331777b,00.htm (read the "Thursday" entry) It was in the back of a "Home Computer Course" magazine. I have scans of those (I think) so I'll see if I can find the original. |
12 March 2009, 20:19 | #14 |
... aka Amix73
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That was great
Here is my go (probably you know it already) ... |
12 March 2009, 20:40 | #15 |
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12 March 2009, 22:52 | #16 |
move.w #$4489,$dff07e
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Not strictly programming... but just pretend
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12 March 2009, 23:27 | #17 |
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13 March 2009, 07:20 | #18 |
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16 March 2009, 12:13 | #19 | |
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From here
Quote:
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17 March 2009, 20:45 | #20 |
... aka Amix73
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