EAB Christmas Song-writing Contest

[mr_a500]

Tired of the repetitive mind-numbing Christmas songs? Well why not change the lyrics to something EAB-related. (It should be a well known song and lyrics should follow the same rhythm.... nothing too insulting or graphic )

Here's an example: (sung like "Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer")


Frederick the fat black tranny,
Had a very shiny butt,
And if you ever saw him,
You would know he was a slut.

All of the other trannies,
Used to laugh and call him names,
They never let poor Frederick,
Join in any tranny chains.

Then one faggy Christmas Eve,
Dizzy came to say:
"Frederick with your butt so bright,
Won't you be my gay tonight?"

Then all the homos loved him,
As they shouted out with glee,
Frederick the fat black tranny,
You'll "go down" in history!

[jmmijo]

That's a nice start, but how can you paint a TRUE PICTURE of Fred if you don't make it graphic enough

[woody57]

To the tune of jingle bells

E....A...B...., E...A...B..., Thats the place for me

If your into Amiga, then join our Family

E....A...B...., E...A...B..., Tis xmas & were PISSED

Cause there are no NEW MIGGIES now to add to Santa's list


Cruising round the net, On a Clapped out desk PC

I wish my miggy could keep up, but its speeds history

If only Commodore, had spent in years of yore

All the money that we paid, on upgrades NOT TRAPDOOR

Instead they cocked it up, so now we gnash our teeth

And blame Bills Gates the Bast**rd, who the world knows is a thief !



Chorus..{E....A...B...., E...A...B..., etc etc }

This song is very short, I know if I get caught

A lynch mob will come knocking & hang me for some sport

So I will make it quick, As xmas makes me sick

And you can take your jingle bells & hang them off your D**K



E....A...B...., E...A...B..., Thats the place for me

If your into Amiga, then join our Family

E....A...B...., E...A...B..., Tis xmas & were PISSED

Cause there are no NEW MIGGIES now to add to Santa's list

[T_hairy_bootson]

On the first day of Christmas My ebay gave to me... an a500 with a HDD
...

Someone else can add to it like the story thread because I cant be arsed atm.

[mr_a500]

OK, we've got a Fred song so now a Dizzy song: (sung like "Frosty the Snowman")

Diz-zy the Blowman
Was a jolly happy soul
With a spandex thong and tight panty hose
And two balls made out of coal

Diz-zy the Blowman
Is a fairy male, they say
He was made to blow and the queer-baits know
How he came to life one day

There must have been some magic
In that old silk bra they found
For when they placed it on his tits
He began to dance around

Humpety hump hump
Humpety hump hump
Look at Dizzy go
Humpety hump hump
Humpety hump hump
Over some gay he knows

[mr_a500]

And a non-gay EAB song: (sung like "Deck the Halls")

Deck the Zone with useful uploads
Fa-la-la-la-la, la-la-la-la
'Tis the season for fast downloads
Fa-la-la-la-la, la-la-la-la
Find us now our favourite archives
Fa-la-la, la-la-la, la-la-la.
Try to a-void stupid RAR files
Fa-la-la-la-la, la-la-la-la.

[Dastardly]

Four calling birds,

Three French hens,

Two much time on hands

And a partridge in a pear tree.

[Muzkat]

Mr_a500 - I love your twisted tunes!

[Mick_AKA]

(to the tune of Fairytale Of New York by the Pogues)

It was xmas on EAB,
and on IRC,
Fred was pimpin'
Anubis and Dizzy,
And then they sang a song,
About CD32's
Fred stuck one up Dizzy's butt,
and said "I dream about you"

Akira's the lucky one,
never round here for long,
I've got a feeling,
This tranny shit aint for him,
So happy chrismas,
turn on your TV's
and waste the day away,
watching Bippy's dodgy DVDs...



We've got crackers and hackers,
we got trannys and queers,
we got old ones and young ones,
they've been here for years,
if you dont like our ways,
and you find you get bored,
you can take your fag ass
to Amiga.org

We're handsome,
and pretty,
like Effy's girl's titties,
when Commodore died,
we all called out for more,
there's ranting and bitchin'
making fun of Mick's Citroen,
it all goes in off-topic,
when we're all talking shite.


And the boys of EAB choir,
still singing Bomb the Bass,
and we're booting workbench up,
for chrismas day.



You're modders,
you're purists,
you're coders with sore wrists,
sat on your Amigas and being drip fed.
no scumbags, or maggots,
but Fred's still a faggot,
Happy christmas with Dizzy,
or Lemmings '93.


And the boys of EAB choir,
still singing Bomb the Bass,
and we're booting workbench up,
for chrismas day.


We used to be someone,
better than anyone,
with their Ataris,
and 8 bit consoles,
we kept the Amiga flame,
though good times and the bad,
oh glorious Amiga,
we built our dreams around you.

And the boys of EAB choir,
still singing Bomb the Bass,
and we're booting workbench up,
for chrismas day.

[musashi5150]

Nice one Mick Good stuff. Now we just need someone to sing it for us and it can be our official EAB Xmas song

[woody57]

agreed Mick-AKA gets my vote too

I can provide the backing track as I have several perfect version's

who wants the honor ??

You will find backing for the song in the ZONE!

[mr_a500]

@Mick_AKA

Impressive . I've never heard "Fairytale Of New York", though, so I don't know how it goes.

@Woody

Nice attempt, but I think some of your rhythm is off (..unless it's sung differently in England )

That phrase "gnash our teeth" scares me. The Bible says that when you go to hell, there will be "gnashing of teeth". Maybe there's a connection - people are "gnashing their teeth" in hell because they have to use Windows. "And thou shalt use poorly-written operating systems in torment and despair, for all eternity."

Dastardly wrote:
Two much time on hands

It took me about 3 minutes per song (in fact, it took me longer to write this post). I just cut & pasted the original lyrics, then changed the words. You can find some Christmas song lyrics here.

[Mick_AKA]

Someone get mr_a500 a copy of Fairytale Of New York!

[woody57]

ERmm I HAVE zoned the backing track already Mick-AKA

Do you NEED the original too ??

[Mick_AKA]

mr_a500 has never heard the original so was for his benefit

[woody57]

Well thats what trackers are for


back soon with an original



In the zone just for Mr-A500

[BippyM]

Deleted From The Zone!!!!

[woody57]

Erm bippy that was a cover version & the backing track is NOT original eiether .......I do know that we CANNOT post copywrite of ANY kind

[BippyM]

errm.. better safe than sorry mate..

[woody57]

Ok I have zoned a LIVE version of me & some pissed mates singing the song ...its NOT a copywrite original

But if you want the backing PM me