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Old 16 September 2006, 00:42   #33
Amiga-based Cyborg
mr_a500's Avatar
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: Canada
Posts: 786
So, basicly...... what needs to be done is:
No, no. Here's what needs to be done:

1. Raise petty cash. To raise the cash, Fred and Dizzy can give blowjobs for $1 (about the most any reasonable person should expect to pay). Once they have made $20,000 they can stop (...if they want).

2. Take said $20,000 and hire some petty thugs to go to Amiga Inc. and "make them an offer they can't refuse" for the rights to all Amiga properties.

3. Raise more cash (Fred and Dizzy can relax this time) by opening a fake charity - something where musicians will donate their services for a concert for the "poor underprivileged Amiga users of the world" (and singing something like "Don't you know it's Christmas... where's my new Amiga"). That should raise a few million.

4. Take few million and hire lawyers. I read somewhere that Commodore Amiga had the patent on the two-button mouse. Use lawyers to sue every computer maker that ever made a two-button mouse (and even the ones that didn't). This should raise a few billion.

5. Take billions and hire Dave Haynie to create new Amiga custom chips - not AAA ...that's old now. He can skip a few generations and go straight to the AAAAAAA chip (A7 for short). Also hire the top chip designers from Intel and IBM to help Dave.

6. Hire Steve Jobs (...or, if unavailable, his non-union Mexican equivalent) to run the new Amiga Corporation. Jobs (or his Mexican equivalent) will know how to market the Amiga and make it "cool" again. How about a super small "Amiga in your pocket" (Marketing tagline "The new Pocket Amiga is so small, it'll make your genitals look HUGE.").

7. Use leftover cash to hire hordes of miscellaneous petty thugs to go randomly to competing companies and "take care of business". (sort of what Microsoft does)

...and that should just about do it.
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